You Should Meet My Lifer, Cheryl

In life, we all need a person… that person. The one who doesn’t flinch at our messiness, who shows up when the world walks out, who holds a mirror up not to judge—but to remind us who we really are. You should meet my lifer, Cheryl.

She’s my best friend, sister, confidant, comrade, and constituent—yes, all of that.

A confidant is someone you can trust with your truth—your raw, unedited, sacred truth. Cheryl is that. I can hand her the most vulnerable pieces of my heart, and she never mishandles them. She listens, prays, uplifts, and keeps whatever I share locked tight in the vault of her loyalty.

A comrade fights beside you, not just for you. Cheryl shows up in the trenches with me, shoulder to shoulder, no matter how hard the battle gets. She doesn’t need the spotlight, she doesn’t ask for credit—she just shows up, with steady hands and a fierce heart.

A constituent is someone who’s part of your mission, your movement, your becoming. Cheryl is deeply invested in my purpose. She pushes me, supports me, challenges me, and celebrates every milestone—even the ones still in the making.

We’ve done this thing called life together for over a decade. And I do mean life. We’ve walked through the wilderness in the dark literally and figuratively. We’ve held hands through surgeries, breakups, divorce, new relationships, situationships, aspired dreams and outdated ones. We’ve weathered occupational hazards, childbirth, near-death experiences, knockouts, blackouts, bail outs and full-on outs. We’ve sat together at children’s events, sporting events, and concerts, in church pews, raised our hands in worship, broken bread in fellowship, and danced through family dynamics like only we could. We’ve laughed over sexual escapades, cried through insecurities, and celebrated glow-ups and questioned blow-ups alike. Birthdays, funerals, new jobs, moves from state to state—even moves just down the street. We’ve carried each other through healthcare scares and we’ve held on tight when everything around us was shaking until we saw the light in the darkness together.

She (and her family) has held space for me in ways most people can’t imagine. She has witnessed me at my lowest—when my light flickered, when the path was unclear, when I wasn’t sure of myself, when or what to do next. And here’s the thing: she hasn’t even seen me at my best yet!

But she believes in that best version of me like it’s already arrived.

She is my sister in Christ and my prayer partner and my permanent spades partner —one who keeps heaven in our conversations and grace in our daily grind and a memorable moment in our mind. She’s always down to ride, always welcoming of the shenanigans, my kids on call speech therapist and “therapist”, the godmother to my three little heart beats that live outside of my chest and the eyes behind my head. Me and my kids dance instructor and daily devotional giver and somehow we’ve still never missed a Birthday celebration together.

We do this Life together with blood, sweat, and heels—a lot of grit, a lot of grace, and a lot of glam. We show up for life’s battles understanding the assignment, ate down, praying hard, laughing loud, and never letting each other fall behind.

Even without a word, even without a check-in, I know Cheryl is in my corner. Her love is felt without needing to be proven. Her loyalty is present without needing to be spoken. That kind of connection doesn’t come often—and it sure doesn’t come easy and will never be taken for granted.

As a life coach, I preach the value of healthy relationships, boundaries, and sacred support systems. Cheryl is all of that in one. She holds me accountable, makes me laugh until we cry, reminds me to rest, and challenges me to rise. The love we share is unconditional, the admiration mutual, the friendship unwavering. Simply put: she is a non-negotiable part of my life.

We all need a Cheryl. And I’m blessed to call mine Lifer.